Date: December 1, 2009
Time: 2:45 pm Pacific Standard Time
Place: The desk drawer of an adolescent Caucasian female, aged 11-18 years old
Artifacts found: One, "All About Me" scrapbook containing photos, memorabilia, and random insightful sentences such as, "My favorite clothes are bellbottoms and baby tees," and "The thing I like most about myself is my hair."
Two, box of rainbow pencils emblazoned with the name "JESSICA"
Three, assortment of newspaper clippings and computer printouts of strange child with glasses and a lightning bolt on his forehead wielding a wand (Note--nearby sticker proclaiming "I'm a Gryffindor" may or may not be related).
Four, collection of wallet size high school dance photos, seemingly gathered from subject's friends (Note--awkward positioning of male behind female with arms positioned around female's stomach).
Five, piece of scrap cloth with phrase, "Cheer Up Emo Kid" printed in ink on the front, possibly intended for usage on clothing.
Six, empty Trojan latex condom wrapper.
Seven, Angeles Girl Scout Council card.
Eight, typed interaction between two parties, one "geniegirl" and other "capupURass27"; selections include, "I just think yer hott" and "Well yer ass is nice."
Oh nostalgia. You're a cruel bitch.
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